The Aliens are coming (cue "Close encounters of the 3rd kind" music)

So today being the nice parents we are, we decided to take the kids on what we called a Magical Mystery Tour (in layman's terms, driving somewhere which doesn't include electronics or fast food and I'm not telling you where so you that you don't bug me about the lack of "fun stuff" while driving).

So picture this (here's some visuals just to help the process)

Glorious day for a drive

Enjoying a picnic in the sunshine

Go for a nice walk to check out the waterfall

Trying and failing to be arty farty and get some nice water shots

WTF IS THAT SHIT CARVED INTO THE ROCKFACE???

I mean seriously, WTF is that??? That is one of the creepiest bloody things I've ever seen. So yeah after that we backtracked and headed off to somewhere much more pleasant. Sweet dreams tonight eh?

I was in your store earlier today

*Sigh* These are the last words you want to hear when you work in retail because they are usually the precursor to a conversation that you really don't want to be having. So today I was pleasantly surprised to answer the phone to a lovely customer who was wanting to thank me for the service I gave her. I was so pleasantly surprised that I thought I'd blog about it (ya know, ASW and all that jazz).

In reality I didn't do much more for her than I would for anyone else. I offered assistance, she was specific in her needs and I managed to source what she wanted. Just another day at the office really. What I guess made it impressive was that she left the store and returned again to purchase more and to thank me. Then phoned a few hours later to thank me again. In this day and age, you don't really get much thanks in retail. Hell there are days where you are lucky if you get an acknowledgement but it's customers like this that make the job worthwhile.

Now in turn this has rubbed off on to me. I've always been friendly and polite to people serving me but I've never rang anywhere and said thanks. I honestly don't know if I'd go that far, but I do make sure that I really thank the person who has shown me great customer service. Not that over the top crazy shit, but the genuine stuff that hopefully that person will walk away remembering.

I heart Werribee

You know every single working day I work past this stall and choke back laughter. Seriously like anyone is going to buy this T-Shirt. ANYONE.

If you've come to Werribee you'll know that there is nothing spectacular to write home about. I mean hell it's not a bad place (unless you count the vision on last nights AFL Footy Show) and I do live in a surrounding suburb but it's just your typical burbs.

That said if you're feeling particularly creative you could write home about the claim to fame shit farm. That and bogans is all Werribee seems to be known for.

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Now in the interest of all things not shit:

And then a big brown shark came

Anyone that's a first time parent will be familiar with all the horror stories that get inflicted on you from the moment that you pee on stick. Apart from the obvious your child being ill or worse the one thing that really struck a chord of horror with me was the dreaded poo stories. In particular the poo painting and pooing in the bath. So for me it probably was a small stroke of good luck that two of my three kids have bowel issues causing constipation. In almost eight years we've had only one poo painting incident (which admittedly did cause lots of gagging and retching on my part) and had no bath incidents...

...until last week.

I was at work and getting just a tad annoyed that I'd been trying to phone Brian several times on both the home phone and mobile and he wasn't answering either. When he finally called me back, I got to speak to Imogen who proudly told me "I did poos in the bath". Is it wrong that I laughed that it was Brian that it happened to? Is it wrong that I'd told all my workmates so that when he came in later that even they laughed at him?

Imogen told me that she was crying and screaming "because the poo came out" and I was laughing even more as I can only imagine my anal retentive germ phobe husband squealing even louder than her at the thought of having to clean it.

I'm still laughing now just typing this out which brings me to the video below which I immediately though of when it happened.

Jumping on the bandwagon

Now I'm not one to join in on the planking phenomen. 

Quite frankly I think it's bloody ridiculous. 

But hey I'll jump on the bandwagon if the right opportunity arises. 

And arise it did.

Planking - Imogen style

Love the country drive

As much as the long drive to and from the inlaws is a killer, I have to admit that I have a really soft spot for country scenery. One day I'd love to just take my time and meander up there with my camera in tow and take pics of everything that catches my eye. Take for instance driving through a leafless avenue of honour with one single bird sitting on a very top branch, the almost completely decimated bluestone cottages in open field, the gorgeous little town of Beaufort which I stop at every time.

One day I'll find the time to do it.

Stupid is as stupid does

After the week I've had I'm thinking Mrs Gump had me in mind when she coined this phrase.

My week of stupids:

• After having packaged up two parcels to post to another store, I then proceeded to cut one open only about an hour later thinking they where deliveries to us. After realising my stupidity and having a laugh about it, no more than 10 minutes later did the same thing with the second parcel.

Source

• For some reason I've lost all ability to count money. Every single day I've somehow stuffed up the cash counting, whether it be from swapping change or just plain on counting. You name it, I stuffed it.

Source

•  I locked myself out of the back room at work not once but twice in a space of 24 hours.

Source

And finally the pièce de résistance:

Had an unfortunate incident with a loose thread and underwear. How the hell people go commando beats me because I was going to stick it out for my last hour at work and after not even 5 minutes I was doing an emergency dash to K-Mart with butt cheeks clenched all the while wondering if people behind me could see I was footloose and fancy free. Now I debated sharing this gem but I figured that the entertainment value was worth the shame.

Source

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And yes again I'm late, but I'll still share the love:

New Kids on the block - Bricks, bricks and more bricks

YAY! All the bricks have arrived.

Who's a pretty birthday boy then?

Ahhh John, there is just so much I can say.  So many adventures shared, so many ups and downs, friends through the good and the bad. I'm so glad that you're a part of our lives. Happy Birthday Old Man. xx

John & I - 1994

And now some words from the wise Freddy Mercury:

Ooo, you make me live now honey
Ooo, you make me live
You're the best friend
that I ever had
I've been with you such a long time
You're my sunshine
And I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
You're my best friend 

Well you're one of them :P

New Kids on the block - To brick or not to brick, that is the question

23.06.11 -Bottom story wrapped and ready to be bricked. YAY!!!
24.06.11 -Two week hold up on bricks :( Nothing can be done now until the bricks arrive. BOO!!!

09.07.11 - We have some bricks. They appear to be the ones that go under the render. At least they're bricks.

MasterChef / DisasterChef

'Cause you're hot and you're cold. You're yes then you're no. You're in and you're out. You're up and you're down...

Much to the kids disgust today they got to spend time with me instead of going to the holiday program. Now usually they wouldn't complain (well that's what I'm telling myself) but today they where having a MasterChef inspired cupcake decorating contest at the holiday program. Not to be outdone but a bunch of carers, it was time for fail mother to step up to the mark. Oh yes and live up to my fail mother reputation I did with this wonderful creation. Note to self :check consistancy of writing gels before attempting a culinary masterpiece. 
Anyway, the main point of the exercise was for the kids to have a great time and that they did. Here's the pics along the way and the final results to prove it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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In keeping with the theme of all things MasterChef, here's what else is cooking in the world of blogs:

Can you point your fingers and do the twist?

For those of you that are parents, somewhere along the line you've probably heard of Raggs. No not The Wiggles, not Wags the Dog but the dodgy brother version, Raggs. For the uninitiated, this is Raggs. 

Raggs is the current bane of my existence and not through any fault of my kids. Now I go to work, not only to make a buck but for some me time (why I chose to do that in a kids clothing store begs to question my mental state though). So imagine my *cough* delight *cough* to find that for the first week of the school holidays not only is there eleventy billion kids everywhere, but there is now a eleventy billion kids crammed into the one spot listening to good ol' Raggs and his buddies right out the front of my store. Like this:

You have no idea how thankful I am for the day off tomorrow. Now if only they where the real deal I'd be happy. At least I could sing along (she types while humming "Well we're gonna go up, then go down. Get back up and turn around. Can you point your fingers and do the twist?")

Getting some bang for your buck

While it's great that this government of ours gives us some great kickbacks for Childcare, sometimes it really does seem ludicrous the amount of money you outlay just to work.

Take school holiday programs for example. My kids are lucky enough to have Grandparents that can take them for a week here and there but they need their breaks too, so holiday program it is. Every fortnight, both Brian and I have one weekday off so we try to arrange that week as being the holiday program week to lessen the financial burden. Even so sending the boys for just three days still leaves me initially out of pocket $288.

So today is was nice to get some bang for my buck. Yes I admit that they usually go to the movies or bowling or have some activity group come to them (last holidays it was a reptile park place that visits with animals) but this time it was nice for the kids to bring something home that they'd made (well stuffed with some sort of foam and a star that they made a wish on) and could keep.

P.S. Yes I know they need haircuts, but they've got it set in their minds that they want to grow their hair like Justin Bieber (god help me).

Washing my mouth out with soap

I know I can't possibly be the only person that finds random sayings get stuck not only in their heads but come flying out of their mouths at what is most probably the wrong time at what is also probably the wrong volume. Can I? 

It seems to be unfortunate that the latest quip seems to include to one but two profanities. And it keeps coming out.

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And even though I was too late to join in myself, for some awesome reading check out this week edition of FYBF: